... and Bonner has gone 165 minutes of these championships without conceding a goal. Oh danger here...

 Learn Ronglish

Big Ron has a lot to say, but all the gold in the world couldn't persuade him to say it in English. No, Ron has no truck with the language of mortals. Instead he has toiled for years in the hot Marbella sun to construct a dialect all of his own.

As other co-commentators wrestle with metaphors, cliches and bon mottes, Ron's unique lingo effortlessly combines all of these and much more. Now, the language has grown too big for its native world of football and fluent speakers can be found everywhere, most recently among online gamblers - a free online poker room recently staged a Ronglish Speakers Only event in tribute to our linguistic pioneer.

In association with the Royal Institute of Commentating, we present an invaluable service to aspiring co-commentators everywhere, a course in Ronglish, the language of the gantry.
 Lesson 1

Spotters' Badge, Lollipop, Second Post
Click here
 Lesson 2  

Early Doors, Full Gun, Little Eyebrows

Click here
 Lesson 3  

Amusement Arcade, Crowd Scene, Tell You What
Click here
 Lesson 4  

Installments, Buddy Holly, Wide Awake Club

Click here
 Lesson 5  

Classic Ron Quotes

Click here
 Lesson 6  

Constructing a Ronglish Superlative
Click here
 Lesson 7  

Watching Cartoons, Sound of the Trumpets, Reducers
Click here
 Lesson 8  

For fun, Curly finger, Playing from amnesia 

Click here
  Lesson 9  

Double Tandem, Arrive,  Change Ball
Click here
  Lesson 10  

Cheating Position, Easy Oasy, Gone Empty
Click here
 
  Lesson 11  

Hollywood Ball, In Captivity, Not So Sure
Click here

The Gaffta Awards chronicles a novel awards ceremony for football's greatest guff merchants.

LEARN RONGLISH
READ THE WORD OF HOD
UNDERSTAND UNCLE BOB
CONDUCT THE BROOKING EXPERIMENT
PERFECT THE HANSEN FORMULA
CRACK ANDY GRAY'S PACE SCALE

More Information >>>



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