Eamon Dunphy

By Danger Here | Pundits
Eamon Dunphy

Eamon Dunphy

The on-again/off-again Ronaldo fatwa:

“A puffball.” “Will never be a player as long as he has a hole in his arse.”

“I couldn’t have been more wrong about Cristiano Ronaldo. “In the history of the game, I can’t remember another winger who has been so prolific in front of goal.”

“What they saw tonight was an impersonator, a clown,a self-indulgent idiot really, doing crazy things. He’s a petulant brat Bill, poncing around all night.”

“We have to reassess Ronaldo’s reputation. Increasingly, he looks like the real deal.”

“Ronaldo is a disgrace… a disgrace to professional football… this fella is a cod.”

Rio Ferdinand

“A bad character, mentally slow” “A tramp”

” Ferdinand is a clown. He was a liability for the first goal and he is always a liability. It was Jan Vennegoor of
Hesselink against Rio Ferdinand of Barclays Bank.”

Liam Brady

“He is often looked on as a great player. He is nothing of the kind. His performance on Wednesday was a disgrace, a monument to conceit adorned with vanity and self-indulgence, rendered all the more objectional by the swagger of his gait.”

“You jumped the fence, baby.”

Giovanni Trapattoni

“A drunken gambler in the casino throwing chips on the table.”
“Taking off Kevin Doyle was lunatic asylum stuff.”

Niall Quinn

“Niall Quinn is a creep. The man’s an idiot, a Mother Theresa.”

Kevin Kilbane

“Kilbane’s head is better than his feet. If only he had three heads, one on the end of each leg.”

John Hartson

“That is not the arse of a seven million pound player.”

Harry Kewell

“Kewell should have been yanked off the pitch at half time and put in a hot bath, a boiling hot bath.”

“He’s fat and a clown, Bill, a fat clown for all to see.”

Luis Garcia“They should put Garcia where he belongs, in the dustbin.”

Djibril Cisse

“Here we have Cisse, right wing, attempts to put in a cross. Bang, he hits the full back. Bang, he hits the full back again. Bang, off the full back again. And once more, bang, smacks the full back again. Millions of euro and he can’t clear the first man. I mean, what’s he trying to do to the full back here? Kill him?”

Steven Gerrard

“Found out. A nothing player.”

Mick McCarthy

“A congenital loser.”

“He’s one of the biggest whingers in world football… he’s a bloody eejit.”

Steve Staunton

“Would you let him drive the train to Cork?”

Terry Venables

“This man’s CV is riddled with failure and worse than failure.”

Bayern Munich

“Well, I don’t like to make outlandish statements. Not all the time. But Wimbledon would have beaten them 10-0.”

Match of the Day

“They just talk drivel. Whoever is winning is great, whoever isn’t, isn’t. It’s banal. And also semi-literate at times … they never criticise in an intelligent way. Anything that isn’t banal is said to be an outburst. They’ve created this cartoon world where everyone talks like Lineker and says nothing.”

“You have to wonder about these clowns.”

Liverpool 4 Chelsea 4

“It was like two drunks in a back alley throwing punches at each other.”

Bill O’Herlihy

“You are Alf, Bill.”

Jose Mourinho

“We’ll all see through Mourinho. We’ll find out he’s just a bengal lancer.”

“Mourinho, he’s poisonous”

Rod Liddle

“He’s the guy who ran away and left his wife for a young one”.

Michel Platini

“Not a great player.”


“Not a great player.”

Zinedine Zidane

“Not a great player.”

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18 Responses to Eamon Dunphy

  1. john leyden says:

    eamomn some 27/30 years ago you did football a programme concerning sunday morning football. it was done in bermondsey south london. about ten minutes from millwall fc. the team was called the blacksmiths arms in rotherhithe street.

    i met up with some of the players today and wondered if you remember the programme and more importantly do you have a copy in your library. if not where could we obtain a copy so we can show our kids and grandchildren our 15 minutes of fame

    hoping that you take the time to reply

    john leyden
    blacksmith arms fc

  2. Chef says:

    Howya John, I don’t think you’ll find Eamo knocking around here but you never know. Will try to get the message to him for you.

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