Would you let Eamon Dunphy drive the train to Cork?
For those of you that missed it, the night’s comi-tragedy in a nutshell.
Stan professes admiration for Czech’s “post-match partying behaviour” - as Billo delicately put it:
“They’re a very talented team… and they’re very competitive underneath.”
Apple falls on Stan’s head - no improvement. Eamo not happy with team:
“This guy is trying to defy the law of football gravity, but he won’t.”
Stan waxes lyrical over Roundy Reid. Gilesy sceptical:
“He must have improved an awful lot between Saturday and today.”
Double-edged Brady’s clever use of feigned agreement:
“Like Eamon, they’re having a bad time. They’ve grown old – gone a little bit stale.”
George, as George does:
“Jankulovski has taken a meat cleaver to the Irish defence.”
Half-time. Dunphy:
“.. a disgrace.”
Two-footed lunge. Game over. George bored - fears for wounded Dunner with FAI track record:
“Let’s hope that’s a surgical staple gun.”
Hard to tell how confident Razor was:
“I’m sure it is, George.”
Eamo beside self:
“Would you let him sit in your seat Bill, without any training.”
Billo reasonble and already beginning campaign for next year’s Jacob’s award or somesuch:
“Well I trained on the job. 40 years in RTE Sport, you have to learn on the job.”
Eamo tries again:
“Would you let him drive the train to Cork?”
Who’s the weakest link now?
“I got the sack. Fifteen weeks. Out the door. I didn’t cry.”

Read all the weekend's guff in the Champions supplement in Mondays' Irish Examiner.

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Don’t think I’d let him.
Eamo, while acting out the train-driving scenario, did seem to think that trains need steering.
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