“Avram’s knowledge is immense. He’s like Yoda. His pearls of wisdom seem to be far-reaching and he speaks a lot of sense.”

So said goalkeeper, David James about new Portsmouth manager, Avram Grant. (Sorry, can’t resist, shouldn’t that be ‘like Yoda, he is’?) Not sure if Mr Grant will appreciate the comparison, but it got me thinking: if Premiership managers got together and formed an amateur dramatic group, they have the perfect cast for Star Wars.

Obviously, Alex Ferguson would have to play Darth Vader; yes, it’s type casting but he’d do it so well. Arsense Wenger: he’s wise, erudite and a little aloof, perfect for the role of Obi-Wan Kenobi. Rafael Benitez battles with an evil empire in the form of his Little and Large bosses everyday, he’d make a good Luke Skywalker. And Martin O’Neill would be ideal as Han Solo who’s tough, outspoken, but always a little outside the main group.

That just leaves Princess Leia … there aren’t any women managers in the Premiership, and no one really special enough to play her. However, they could recall former Chelsea manager and self-appointed Special One, Jose Marino to fill the role. Not that I think he’s anything like her, just that it would be a laugh to see how special he looks when prancing around in a gold bikini.

Finally, while Avram Grant may share personal qualities with Yoda, there’s another manager who resembles him physically – think of the baggy face, the mournful expression: it’s Harry Redknapp!

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