Grilling Roy Hodgson pre-match, Gabby Logan got unnecessarily personal:
“And your gut…?”

Woy preferred to concentrate on how the Slovenians have knuckled down since some creative pre-tournament accounting;
“Slovenia have been disciplined since the offset.”

On Five Live, they were keen to take the pressure off Fabio’s boys:
“England, win the game emphatically and you will be forgiven.”

Alas, on RTE, Eamon Dunphy was raising the stakes:
“Don’t forget what happened Robert Green, his life is over, in a certain kind of way.”

Guy Mowbray bemoaned some theatrics:
“He just got a little tap”

Lawro did what Lawro does:
“Could’ve been a plumber”.

George Hamilton is not star struck by the ineffective Novakovic:
“Known as Super Nova, he didn’t shine too brightly there.”

Soon it was Lawro’s own plumbing in question:
“Watching England is sometimes a cure for constipation.”

George noted that Rooney was looking at Fabio Capello like he’d arrived home to find egg and chips on the table:
“It’s like the household where the husband and wife aren’t getting on terribly well. You just hope they can repair their relationship for the sake of the team.”

And brought news of the vastly reduced ambitions of England’s players:
“England are hanging on for grim death.”

Afterwards, John Giles was having impure thoughts about Gabby Logan:
“Well, she seemed to be a very attractive girl. Maybe that’s why she’s doing the interviews.”

But Eamo was still mourning Rob Green:
“If they hadn’t got a result today they were facing crucifixion.”

Shearer took over. Sense took leave:
“We done a football.”
“Today’s match was toughicult.”

Alan Hansen’s botched his marriage guidance counsellor application:
“You can never question John Terry’s commitment?”

While Lee in the sky with Dixon simply started to wig out:
“There’s triangles everywhere!”

Spotter’s badges to @AndrewSteel88 @kateywateykins @swearimnotpaul and @danielsexitoni

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