Harry Redknapp is indecently pleased with his striker’s return:
“Remy looked like he might be getting over that groin strain. He showed a few flashes.”

Paul Merson puts Gareth Bale in his place:
“No disrespect, but he’s Welsh.”

Joe Hart will never say die:
“We’ll not give up even if 12 points behind with one game to go.”

Niall Quinn splits hairs:
“City are coming with dogged guile I suppose rather than style and substance.”

Des Cahill’s update on the one-team league:
“Scotland have gone 19 points clear at the top of the SPL.”

Keith Andrews has a point about Trap and Stephen Kelly:
“Obviously, they’ve both had their indifferences.”

Darren Fletcher loses his bearings at Fulham:
“Craven Cottage, on the banks of the river Trent.”

Alan Parry hasn’t carefully studied the work of lawyers:
“He’s a lawyer by trade, so he should be used to keeping the peace.”


Come summer, Niall Quinn expects Manchester City to be interested in “caviar, Falcao, these people.”

Edinson Cavani, we presume.


Stelling sphinx he can keep this up for the rest of the season:

“I promised no more bad jokes about the Egyptians playing for Hull, but they’re having a Pharaoh shocker at the moment.”


Stelling: “If you’re a manger, what do you say to Lee Catermole before a game?”

Charlie Nicholas: “See you in 30 minutes.”


Out of Europe, out of everything, but Brentan is still fighting:

“We’ve lost the battle tonight but in terms of the war, going forward, we’re very much, as I say, looking forward to that.”


Talksport’s Ian Abrahams in Paris:

“You can’t can fish and chips there. All you can get are snails’ legs.”


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