The top 10 dictionary manglers:

10. “They haven’t made many sautées forward.”
Clive Allen

9. All the cul-de-sacs are closed for Scotland.
Joe Jordan

8. There is great harmonium in the dressing room.
Sir Alf Ramsey

7. “He’s not going to adhere himself to the fans.”
Alan Mullery

6. “Well, I’ve seen some tackles, Jonathan, but that was the ultimatum.”
Alan Mullery

5. “You were a hinchpin in midfield.”
Phil Neal

4. “When he makes a decision, there’s no arms thrown into the air and no gestating.”
Niall Quinn

3. “Liverpool will be without Kvarme tonight – he’s illegible.”
Jimmy Armfield

2. “Our first goal was pure textile.”
John Lambie

1. “Who should be there at the far post but yours truly, Alan Shearer.”
Colin Hendry

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