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Total
and utter control. Oh there's a loose one. Danger
here..... |
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Week 7. Nouveau Ronglish - A developing language |
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No
one can ever suggest that Ronglish is dead. Conscious
of the thirst for knowledge out there among his
legions of fans, Ron is forever modernising the
language's extensive vocabulary. Thanks to our
eagle-eared readers, we can now bring you a new
lesson featuring 3 pieces of Nouveau Ronglish.
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| 14.
watching cartoons |
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| Very much
a fan of the sun, Ron's devotion to perfecting his
distinctive Tangoman colouring leaves little time
for sitting around watching television. However,
when he does have a few minutes to spare, Ron
loves to catch up with his favourite Tom and Jerry
episodes. Hence, when the big man
witnesses any outlandish acts on the field of
play, he reckons the protagonists involved have
also been taking their cues from his
heroes. Ron
might say: Tell you what, Clive, he's been
watching cartoons if he thinks he can beat Barthez
from there.
Mrs Ron might say: Well I never, Ron.
You've been watching cartoons if you think I'm
going to wear that.
Ronglish points: **
Sadly,
cartoons are rarely shown at the bars and golf
courses at which most co-commentators spend their
days. So this piece of Nouveau Ronglish hasn't the
some resonance for most men of the mic.
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| 15.
sound of the trumpets |
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It's
not widely known that Ron keeps a host of model
armies in the cellar of one his Marbela
retreats, regularly restaging many of the
world's most famous battles. His favourite
tactic is of course a good old-fashioned cavalry
charge and this often comes to mind during
commentary when a team makes a bold tactical
switch.
Ron
might say : Tell you what, Peter. I think
they're going to pull off the little full back,
stick the big man up the front and go to the
sound of the trumpets.
Mrs
Ron might say around 2 am: Blimey
Ron, you been at the beans again, I can't get a
wink of sleep with you going to the sound of the
trumpets.
Ronglish
points: **
Of
course little George Hamilton also has a bedroom
stocked with toy soldiers and it's only a matter
of time before he pulls this one out as Ireland
try to salvage something late in a game.
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| 16.
reducers |
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Though
not a violent man, even Ron accepts the need for
a bit of argy bargy ever now and again. This
classic piece of Nouveau Ronglish refers to the
type of "introductory" challenges
defenders like to dish out to potential
amusement arcades early on in a game.
Ron
has say:
Babbel might want to put a few reducers into
Pires early on.
Mrs
Ron might say around 4am: Ron,
you don't stop going to the sound of the
trumpets, I'll have to stick a few reducers into
you.
Ronglish
points: ****
Can
see this becoming one of the Ronglish greats
with blood thirsty co-commentators like Gray and
Kamara giving it loads of reducing.
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