Ardiles strokes the 
ball like it was part
of his anatomy. 
Jimmy Magee

   First Phase - Fight 3

 Ron "The Godfather" Atkinson v John "Samurai" Motson

This was to be Ron's night - the fight to get him nicely warmed up to progress all the way to the final and regain the title. John Motson, however, had other ideas. Ron came out swinging, accompanying each blow with baffling Ronglish epithets. It was all Motty could do to stay standing, although he did manage to get in a few blows with his titanium alloy samurai sword.

If Commentator Wars fights were decided on points decisions, it would have been tough to call this one. As one round followed another, Motty gradually came into it, while Big Ron's Ronglish chatter ceased almost entirely. Even the crowd above the Pit, normally bloodthirsty, fell quiet as these two giants of the arena settled into a war of attrition.

It was Motson who delivered the fatal strike in the 19th round, with one fell swoop of his sword severing Atkinson's vocal cords, rendering further Ronglish broadsides impossible. Big Ron's bid quickly fell away to nothing. Motty pinned him to the bloodstained floor in the 20th, and that was it. History was made. Big Ron had gone out in Phase One.

Cheer on Your Man!

The Pit's gone quiet, but you can still check out how your man did.

Ram it home, Ron.
Mix it up, Motty.

Current Results

Diamond John Says

Ron will probably go into seclusion for months to recover from this one. For a kick-off, he needs to let his vocal cords heal, so there'll be no opportunity for co-commentary for some time. However, rumours about his imminent retirement from the Wars are just that - rumours.

Diamond John Says

Neither Motty's lack of natural athleticism nor the prohibition on nerve gas in the Pit mattered one whit in this contest. Motson won it through moral courage and wiliness. 

He's past Ron. The sky's the limit now. Place your bet before it's too late. 

Tournament odds  

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Click here to see the pre-fight buildup to this bout.