Ardiles strokes the 
ball like it was part
of his anatomy. 
Jimmy Magee
 
          
 

   First Phase - Fight 1

 Des "Standing Count" Cahill v Michael "The Worrier" Lyster
Commentator Wars 2001 opens with a Montrose derby featuring two tournament long shots. Cahill makes his "Wars" debut having been content to stand around chatting to punters and slugging stout at previous festivals. Lyster's been here before but he hasn't a good record at these championships. He missed Wars 2000 having lost his way returning from the Galway International Rally and shipped a heavy beating in '99 after provoking Brian Kerr with idle talk about GAA. The contest has been given extra spice after Des recently overheard the Director of Radio mutter in the RTE canteen, "Didn't Lyster make a fine job of the Sports News the other morning. How much are we paying Cahill anyway?". Should be a cracker.

Cheer On Your Man!

Vote now to give your favourite the edge.

Hammer him Cahill!
Finish him Lyster!
Current Results
Diamond John Says
Lack of experience in The Pit could hurt Cahill but despite the stout-based training programme, the big radio man looks in the shape of his life. While fitness will still be a worry, if Des can reproduce the qualifying form that saw him bamboozle Martin Tyler with nifty footwork and tales of the Dublin County Junior Championship, he could go a long way.

Verdict. Should have too much power for Lyster. Could make the semis.
Tournament odds  25/1
Diamond John Says
While not in the same class as the likes of Ron, Gilesy and Andy Gray when it comes to experience and tactical know how, the nervous Galwegian's full body armour and tough GAA-based training regime will enhance his fitness for battle. Could wilt though if Cahill produces anecdotes.






Verdict. First Round Exit.
Tournament odds  66/1

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