Eamon Dunphy

Eamo’s favoured guff technique involves picking an Irish national team manager, chucking a biro across a studio and roaring a random selection of the following adjectives: congenital loser, sham, embarrassment, scurvy pup, wagon, spoofer, decentskin, imposter, bully. And then there are his moments of clarity:


"The overwhelming view of the listeners is that… they are split down the middle."


Talkshow host Eamo begins another Keane defence excitedly before realising the numbers aren't quite with him.


"When you weed out the nutters, it's around 80-20 behind Roy."


Not to be deterred, Eamo the Democrat finds a way.


"Usually it takes a bottle of Bacardi and a gallon of Coke to get John out of his seat."


Eamo bemused by Johnny Gilesy good humour shocker after Ireland score.


Giles: "Football fans have short memories, Eamon."
Dunphy: "I found at Millwall that fans had long memories, John. They never forgot how bad I was! HA HA HA HA HA!"
Giles: [Silence]


Billo on Sam Allardyce's survival as Bolton manager: "They'll be dancing on the streets of Limerick."
Eamo: "They'll be dancing on the streets of Limerick anyway, Bill."


"These aren't the incidents that win and lose games. These are false."


Eamo's tired and emotional view of the two Russian goals that had won their World Cup clash with Tunisia.


"He's one of the biggest whingers in world football... he's a bloody eejit."

Probably the nicest thing he's ever said about Mick McCarthy.


"History is today and tomorrow."


Furious Eamo goes on the defensive after Billo questions Keane's "legacy".


"Eamon Dunphy is a nobody with one virtue; honesty and realism."


Eamo pays a mathematically imprecise tribute to himself.


"The first two-syllable word I learned when I was growing up was 'discretion."


Numbers just aren't his thing, are they?


"Kilbane's head is better than his feet. If only he had three heads, one on the end of each leg."



Much more Dunphy Guff Soon