Haul Baz Davies off the petangue court and back into the gantry, Motty will surely never hold a mic again.

Who will ever forget the plaintive, disbelieving wail when the second went in:

“The flag is not up!”

Long before the end, he was a sad and beaten man, shorn of human dignity:

“Surely there is going to be one more chance. Surely there is.”

Lawro was little help, seemingly unable even to profer a hug:

“Say something Mark, say something.”

“I can’t.”

All his faith was put in Becks:

“This is a corner …Beckham to take it please.”

And when it was done, you worried the old war obsession would rear its ugly head:

“I haven’t seen scenes of desolation like this since Germany… well… won here in 2000.

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