football quotes, humour and guff

Reporter Jeremy StLouis to Chivas’ Jesse Marsch

Marsch: “Yeah, er, we actually won.”

Stand up Giggsy:

 ”I was just amazed by what was happening around us, we didn’t know what was going on, but that’s the French I suppose.”

We’ve already discussed the real (serious) teams, perhaps it’s time to reflect a moment on the topic that occupies the other 50% of every waking moment of J Giles’ and E Dunphy’s lives; the great players. Read the rest of this entry »

Forget patches, gum or replacement Mr. Kiplings, sage Eamo - proudly triumphant over the satanic hold of nicotine addiction - finally reveals to Tubridy the prized secret to giving up smoking:

“If I want a cigarette, I have one.”
Mind you, that life-changing revelation didn’t come before the vile weed induced Eamo to seek answers many have craved for years: 

“You’ve got to ask yourself the question, Am I a gobshite? And if you’re a smoker, you are.”

That’s cleared a lot up.

An airbus we assume. But hands up those who’d feel safe climbing on board a Matt Le Tissier aircraft. It might produce out of nowhere a magnificent inflight tea and breadroll, but could you ever really be sure it wouldn’t stick its hands on its hips and disappear completely just as you soared above the English channel?

A hungover Nell McCafferty. With a pack of cards. And an old Paul Daniels video. Half of which has had Murder She Wrote taped over it. Could produce more magic. Than the eon-sponsored. For that is how media outlets. And naturally this is one. Refer to it as. FA Cup. And yes. We are speaking slowly and distinctly. As Geoff Shreeves might do. In the manner of a simpleton. When he is addressing post match. A foreign player. Who more often than not. Has a grasp of English. Far superior. To this almost more irritating than Houghton. Of men. Read the rest of this entry »

Hats off to the Beeb commentator on Newcastle - Brum. After Sibierski took a kick in the head, the moment he’d doubtless waited seasons for had finally arrived:

“Antoine decked”

Spotter’s badge Ed Leahy

Keys: “So Andy, can majesty overcome muscle?” Read the rest of this entry »

Well Rafa, gentleman of renowned tactical acumen, what do you think went wrong? Was it the team you picked? What about sticking Just William and Ziggy from Grange Hill on the right wing? Were the Arse just that good? Your verdict sir?

“The difference could be the goals that we conceded.”

Phil Neville lays bare his ambitions for Everton’s seasons:

“Fourth spot is what we are aiming for… we don’t want to be second best.”