chris_kamara

ORGAN DINER

The coveted Random Comparison of the Season award looks set to remain in the Kamara household for another year after this appraisal of Carlos Tevez:

“They’ve got  this man with a heart as big as…as big as… a plate.”

GOT TO START SOMEWHERE

With his shrewd, calculating  mind,  Setanta new boy  Russell Osman  has adapted quickly to the demands of co-commentary:

“If Spurs don’t get one goal, they won’t get any.”

A BIT STRONG

It’s abundantly clear what Sky makes of Arsenal.

Andy Gray on Fabregas: “I thought the little bender was coming there.”
Richard Keys fondly recalls Bobby P: “You might remember that Pires bender.”

ALSUFFRAGETTES NO FOOLS
And this week’s prize of a year’s membership  to  Portmarnock Golf Club goes to Alan Hansen, the bravest pundit in MOTD history:

“Gabby, even  you can understand that.”

MONEY TALKS

With the economy in the mess it’s in, surely Cowen, Lenihan and co have missed a trick not getting Tony Cascarino involved  as a spokesman:

“I’m not sure about the financial strings at United.”

WHEN THE FEELING’S GONE

Dean Ashton’s enforced retirement  caused a drastic malfunction of Alan Shearer’s onboard thesaurus:

“It’s a tragic tragedy for him.”

PURE VILLA

But sometimes,  as  Shearer knows, it’s enough to just be yourself:

“Man United weren’t at their best but they came up against a very, very Aston Villa side.”

FAR-FETCHED

It’s a long shot, but Ray Houghton has a theory why Rafa might have been slow to let Aquilani loose on the Premier League:

“Maybe  he’s seen him in training Bill.”

HANDY TASK MASTER

If Razor ever goes into management, he’ll be the most considerate boss ever:

“At the moment, maybe too much is asked of the lad  (Aquilani).”

BUNDES-CELTIC LEAGUE

According to  Phil Thompson, Jurgen Klinsmann  presided over one of the darkest periods in German history:
“How long did he last at Bayern Munich? They were fifth or sixth in the Scottish League.”

HARSH BUT FAIR

It’s not the dodgy crossing, the poor work-rate or the tendency to give the ball away easily that worries  Paul Merson about Nani:

“Name me a real top-drawer player who does them back flips.”

GREAT EXPECTATIONS

Ray Stubbs  tenderly lathered  Ugo  Ehiogu  and Kevin Keegan  in aromatic oils during the buildup to United-Villa:

“When you watch Wayne Rooney play, what are the sensations you experience?”

NO SURPRISES

Has the magic died between Tony Cas and Alex Ferguson?

“He ceases to amaze me as a manager.”

ON THE MONEY

Hermann Hreidarsson  sees the futility  of  Portsmouth’s recent form:
“We’ve been playing football, creating chances and not picking up points. That’s pointless.”

MIRROR IMAGE

United’s Da Silva twins continue to fluster Joe Royle:

“He’s got two  Rafaels  missing.”

Spotter’s badge to @Maldini

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