As George Constanza liked to put it; you can stuff your sorries in a sack.
Sure there were plenty of teeth-gritted apologies when Richard Keys rocked up at Talksport yesterday, but this was a man with more than sorry on his agenda.
No, Keysy had blame to offload and was about to sweep it to all corners like Charlie Adam in a muck-spreader.
And nobody was safe.
1. Those notorious slavering sexists in the Manchester United dressing room:
I noticed Rio Ferdinand tweeted and said prehistoric banter, no place for it. Rio, are you telling me it does not take place in the Manchester United dressing room? Because, my information says it does.
2. The Upton Park IT department. Dumb. And probably sexist.
I tried to ring Karen twice on Sunday night. She didn’t answer the phone. There is no answer phone on Karen’s mobile. That may be a sign of the times at West Ham I don’t know.
3. Karen Brady. Not sexist, but a chancer.
A by-product of all of this of course; it took her and West Ham out of the press. She knows and so does everybody else what a mess they made of trying to appoint Martin O’Neill and she was getting it in the neck.
4. Lads mag editors. Sexists. Hey, this one might even stick.
There is a wider conversation here about is it sexist, is it lads mag banter. Is there a place for it? That is not for me to judge and this is not the time for that conversation.
5. Ex-Wolves keeper Matt Murray, whose thirst for sexism is so great he can’t relax before games until somebody sticks on Chubby Brown.
One of the reasons why we probably were in overdrive on Saturday is we had a fresh guy called Matt Murray who used to play in goal for Wolverhampton. We wanted to make him feel relaxed and comfortable, and that was part of that process.
6, Every last sexist Tom, Dick and Andy at Molineux.
I know when you listen to these things in the manner in which they have been presented they sound very different, but of course it was all part of a much wider conversation that everybody there on the day in many respects was having.
7. Bloggers and tweeters, those egotistical bastards. Undoubtedly sexists too.
I have been described as aloof. If operating in a manner that I do, staying away from red carpet, staying away from tweeting. Staying away from blogging. Keeping myself to myself for my family. My ego does not need that. If that is aloof then I am guilty of that as well.
8. Wimbledon. Attention seekers. And probably sexists.
Listen we (Sky Sports) have grown up with nobody liking us. We are a little bit like Wimbledon, we have to upset people along the way to get to noticed. We started out with all those colourful jackets I used to wear.
9. Every female journo who’s ever worked in television, the helpless simpletons, all of whom owe their jobs to kindly, non-sexist Keysy.
There are a lot of very good female presenters out there who I have played a major part in getting a break in this country and they know it. Gabby, Kelly Kates who’s Dad called me right at the start of her career and said can you help. Course you can and you try to. Kirsty, Claire who is very good at what she does.
10. Those unknown potential sexists at the BBC would never have got a break either but for Richard.
Just to prove that I don’t just help those of one particular gender; Alan Hanson, Alan Shearer.
11. Charlotte Jackson. A red rag to a sexist.
Charlotte can handle herself.
12. Onto the “smashing it” business, the implication is that Souey and Jamie weren’t so innocent. And perhaps Ruud eventually looked up from his phone. Sexists.
Again, it’s a very selective moment from that studio at night. Read into that what you will.
13. Talksport. They talk about sport. Must be sexists. As for journos; incorrigible sexists.
What I think there is, is a sports room probably a little bit like yours, probably a little bit like any other Fleet Street office that you care to mention. A little boisterous like any dressing room up and down the country
14. A professional footballer. Was it that renowned Ayia Napa filmmaker, who knows? Whoever it was, let’s be clear, he is a sexist.
There was a professional footballer who passed judgement. Listen, I don’t care. They should, it’s right and proper that they have. I’ve said that. But people have short memories. That very same professional footballer was on the phone to me a couple of years back, when family matters he had were a bit of a problem and said, look need a bit of help here son, and you do your best. We did. We did. That seems to have been forgotten quite quickly.